Advice, n. The smallest current coin.
Conservative, n. A statesman enamored of existing evils, as opposed to a Liberal, who wants to replace them with others.
Diplomacy, n. The patriotic art of lying for one’s country.Egotist, n. A person of low taste, more interested in himself than in me.
Four entries from Ambrose Bierce’s The Devil’s Dictionary (1911).
The pitifulest thing out is a mob; that’s what an army is — a mob; they don’t fight with courage that’s born in them, but with courage that’s borrowed from their mass, and from their officers. But a mob without any man at the head of it is beneath pitifulness.
Mark Twain, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (1884), Chapter 22.
When a prisoner of style escapes it’s called an evasion.
Mark Twain, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (1884), Chapter 39.
If our government knows anything about these devices, the people should be told at once. A lot of people out here are very much disturbed. Some think these things may be from another planet. But they aren’t harming anyone and I think it would be the wrong thing to shoot one of them down — even if it can be done. Their high speed would completely wreck them.
Kenneth Arnold, as quoted in “‘Flying discs’ called real by 2 air veterans,” Chicago Times (July 7, 1947). Businessman and aviator Arnold had reported seeing nine mysterious flying objects speeding by Mount Rainier in Washington State, on June 24, and thereby starting the modern UFO craze.
There is no passion so contagious as that of fear.
Michel de Montaigne, Essais, Book III, Ch. 13 (1595).
The sad truth of the matter is that most evil is done by people who never made up their minds to be or do either evil or good.
Hannah Arendt, The Life of the Mind (1978).